Rev. Tessie Mandeville
February 11, 2007
Christ Covenant MCC
Decatur, GA 30033

It's a crisp winter day in San Francisco. A woman in a red Honda, Christmas presents piled in the back, drives up to the Bay Bridge tollbooth. “I'm paying for myself, and for the six cars behind me,” she says with a smile, handing over seven commuter tickets.

One after another, the next six drivers arrive at the tollbooth, dollars in hand, only to be told, “Some lady up ahead already paid your fare. Have a nice day.”

The woman in the Honda, it turned out, had read something on an index card taped to a friend's refrigerator: “Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.” The phrase seemed to leap out at her, and she copied it down.

Other people began to hear about this and started spreading the word. It was Anne Herbert who said, “Here’s the idea: Anything you think there should be more of, do it randomly. Kindness can build on itself as much violence can.”

With our news media constantly reporting random cruelties and senseless acts of violence, it is a relief to know that there are people in this world practicing random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.

Practicing kindness is the essence of what it means to be faithful .

The 8 th century prophet, Micah, was a fearless champion of the oppressed and under-privileged, who attacked the socio-economic injustice of his day. He had to remind the people of the essence of their faith. He said that being in right relationship with God was more than following the laws of animal sacrifice. He wasn’t saying that the sacrifice was wrong; he was saying that it wasn’t all that was required to be in right relationship with God. To be in right relationship, Micah said that the audacity of mercy is required.That we are required to:do justice, show kindness and walk humbly with God. According to every prophet this world has ever known, justice means to practice grace and mercy—to practice loving kindness, towards others.

In the book, Traveling Mercies: Some Thoughts on Faith, author Anne Lamott, tells a story of loving kindness that she found in the congregation of St. Andrew’s Presbyterian Church. “When I was at the end of my rope, the people at St. Andrew tied a knot in it for me and helped me hold on. The church became my home in the old meaning of home--that it’s where, when you show up, they have to let you in. They let me in. They even said, ‘You come back now.’”

I don’t know all the circumstances that led Anne Lamott to the end of her rope. I do know that she’s a single mother who has struggled against poverty and I know that she struggles with addiction issues. I imagine that some of this is why she found herself at the end of her rope.

But when Lamott, early in her pregnancy, announced to her congregation that she was going to have a baby, the congregation cheered. She says, “They brought clothes; they brought me casseroles to keep in the freezer; they brought me assurance that this baby was going to be a part of the family. And they began slipping me money.”

What I find especially moving about this story is that the congregation is full of older, African-American people who had very little money themselves. Yet it was the older African-American women who slipped tens and twenties into Anne’s pockets, and one older black woman named, Mary Williams, who brought her little plastic baggies filled with dimes. Years later, she still does.

Anne Lamott says, “Mary doesn’t know that professionally I’m doing much better now; she doesn’t know that I no longer really need people to slip me money. But what’s so dazzling to me, what’s so painful and poignant, is that she doesn’t bother with what I think she knows or doesn’t know about my financial life. She just knows we need another bag of dimes, and that is why I make my son, Sam, go to church…because we all need the kindness of people who give even more than they can afford out of love.”

Practicing kindness is the essence of what it means to be faithful . The Dalai Lama, the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism says it this way: My religion is simple. My religion is kindness. Loving-kindness must be a deliberate decision and a conscious practice.

We have a distinct teaching from Jesus himself on this matter. Jesus preached love of neighbor and love of enemy alike. I don’t think we can talk about loving our enemies without talking about forgiveness. First of all, it might be helpful for us to understand what forgiveness is. The word forgiveness literally means “to not harbor resentment.” Carter Heyward, an Episcopal priest and theologian says that forgiveness is “a social, political, and psycho-spiritual leap out of the past, toward the future.” This means that forgiveness is a letting go of what has been done. It is a decision to move beyond one’s own woundedness. Forgiveness is an act of healing, mostly for ourselves. It does not change the past but it does enlarge the future.

I think it’s also important to talk about what forgiveness is not. It is not a sign of weakness. It is not changing the past. It is not forgetting what happened or pretending that nothing happened. Forgiveness is a courageous attempt to live in an impossibly flawed world where at times injustice reigns, the bad guys live to a ripe old age, and the good die young.

Today there is a group of women who are going deeper in the areas of forgiveness and loving kindness than they probably ever imagined they would. The group is known as MAMA: Mothers Against Murder and Assault. They are working on strategies to prevent and intervene in the epidemic of violence in Oakland, CA, and surrounding areas. They go into local jails and work with the inmates, who are mostly young, African-American men. They teach a 12-week curriculum which focuses on building skills in job attainment, anger management, and interpersonal relationships in order to improve the youths’ chances of successful re-integration into their communities. This curriculum stresses the value of cultural diversity and the importance of respecting life; it identifies emotional and developmental needs, and builds self-esteem.

But here’s the thing. The crucial point is in the 9 th week, when the women reveal their identities as the mothers of murdered children. They bring in pictures and memorabilia of their lost children and share their children’s stories. And then they leave. They allow the young men to reflect on the stories with the pictures and other items surrounding them. These youth are shell shocked, desperate with guilt, and literally begging for forgiveness.”

These courageous women mentor the young men who killed their sons! This group of ordinary women, who have been intimately touched by violence, are saying, “The cycle of violence stops here.” They are putting their bodies on the line in order for their communities to survive. They are reaching out through their grief to stop the cycle of violence because their community’s survival depends on keeping young African-American men alive. If the cycles of violence, oppression and incarceration are to be broken, they have decided that they have to do it. If this is not the audacity of mercy, then I don’t know what is!

Forgiveness is an act of healing, mostly for ourselves. It does not change the past but it does enlarge the future. Jesus doesn’t ask us to fall in love with our enemies. I believe what he’s asking of us is to not let those who have hurt us, determine how we will behave. He’s asking us not to let our enemies control our behavior.

Rabbi Hillel, a brilliant rabbi and contemporary of Jesus, was taunted by some people. They came along and said, “Rabbi Hillel, if you can recite the Torah standing on one foot, we will be converted to Judaism.” So he said, “All right…” [Tessie stands on one leg] “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. The rest is commentary.” That was the Torah in a nutshell for that Rabbi.

Every great religion has some version of the Golden Rule—Buddhism, Judaism, Islam and Christianity. There are many paths to God and those paths are meant to be paved with kindness and compassion, with justice and with love. That is what religion is supposed to be about.

What does our God require of you but to: do justice, show kindness and walk humbly with God? This verse is written upon the cornerstone of our sanctuary. M ay it also be written into our very hearts because practicing kindness is the essence of what it means to be faithful. Let it be so. Amen.

Random Acts of Kindness Foundation

Anne Lamott, Traveling Mercies: Some Thoughts on Faith, “Why I Make Sam Go To Church,” 1999

Rev. Dr. Carter Heyward in the writing, “The Ones at the Foot of the Cross,” 2003

Rotynia Adams-Payne, Executive Director and Co-Founder of Mothers Against Murder and Assault

Story told by Rev. Dr. Penny Nixon at MCC San Francisco

Copyright © 2007 by Rev. Tessie Mandeville. Permission granted for non- profit circulation with attribution of author and venue. Other rights reserved